How To Achieve God's Best Life For Parent and Child

Once upon a Bible time, a Canaanite mother determined that, even though her family lived on the wrong side of the tracks, her daughter deserved the best that life had to offer. This was back in the day when people somehow believed that a spiritual disconnection was at the root of every misfortune; and that the right spiritual connection could result in change. Small wonder then, that the mother set out to find the Spiritual Teacher who had the reputation of adding quality to people’s lives.

The woman diagnosed her daughter as being “demon-possessed.” God forbid, but you may also have a child possessed by a spirit of laziness, of disobedience, of bulimia, of addiction, of anger, of self-defeat or any of a hundred negative dispositions that plague today’s young men and women. The Gentile mother deserves credit for recognizing her daughter’s plight and taking urgent action to help her child become the purposeful creation she was designed to be.

Her search and success (Matthew 15:21-28) provide a model for today’s prudent parent.

It was her daughter who had the problem, but the mother’s first prayer to Jesus was for herself. “Have mercy on me, O Lord, Son of David!” (22)

It is the ultimate expression of concern and compassion to identify with your child’s dilemma. You cannot take full responsibility for her attitude or conduct; but fact is, she has some of your genes; the environment in your home affects her; your reaction to her situation can make it better or worse. Variable factors like these make it necessary for you to seek spiritual wisdom and guidance if you will be effective in parenting your child. To help you affect a positive difference in her mental, spiritual or health improvement, pray your first prayer for you.

Present situation: “My daughter is severely demon-possessed.” But He answered her not a word (22, 23). Jesus’ silence encouraged the mother to consider another possible situation; to envision her child in a role different to the one she described.

Look beyond your children’s deficiencies. Evaluate their strengths and envision what they could become. Consult with them about their ambitions. Help them set goals. Then, based on what you and your children agree upon, you’ll have something specific and productive to pray about, on their behalf.

When the disciples heard the mother’s cry for help, they spoke their minds. “Send her away, for she cries out after us.” (24) They were tired and needed to rest. They might have said this whether or not the woman was an outcast, undeserving Gentile.

Jesus responded to the disciples: “I was not sent except to the lost sheep of the house of Israel,” (24) as if to say, “I shouldn’t even have to deal with this woman.”

Whether or not the woman heard this conversation between Jesus and His disciples, her perspective was different to theirs. She had convinced herself that her child was worth saving. Like her, fathers and mothers everywhere should believe that their children’s godly worth is unaffected by what people think and say.

Then she came and worshiped Him, saying, “Lord, help me!” (25) Despite the delay, when the mother finally caught Jesus’ attention, she gave Him her ultimate devotion. She believed in His Omnipotence. No parent can improve on her principled steadfastness and unshakeable hope.

But He answered and said, “It is not good to take the children’s bread and throw it to the little dogs.” (26) The disciples knew that Jesus was referring to the Jews as the children, and to the Gentiles including the woman, as underprivileged, stray dogs. The woman’s response makes us wonder if she understood it that way.

And she said, “Yes, Lord, yet even the little dogs eat the crumbs which fall from their masters’ table.” (27) Did she think that He was referring to her as a little household pet dog, waiting for the morsels which would spill over from the disciples’ plates? She perceived that it cost Jesus no extra effort to supply her need. She pointed out that His generous nature offered more than enough to whomsoever He served, and there was bound to be leftovers.

What would it say about Him if He denied any parent His favor (which is enough for everyone) just because the children's names were not Sasha and Malia Obama? He values the children based on the fact that He gave them their worth, which is unaffected by ancestry or neighborhood.

Then Jesus answered and said to her, “O woman, great is your faith! Let it be to you as you desire.” And her daughter was healed from that very hour. (28)

In the parents’ pursuit of God’s best life for their children, they acquire God’s best life for themselves.